We've got a chores' list finally written. Except I don't want to call it "chores" because I feel rather uninspired and like I should dress like Caroline Ingalls to do said chores. So it's called "Everyday Care" and the children are taking that title in the spirit with which it was written whilst grinning hugely at me. They find their mother's 'peace love and mung beans' attitude towards life really amusing at times.

So far, with the external cues from this, the menu planner on the refrigerator and the date for a family meeting involving hot chocolates with exotic marshmallow varieties (Thank you Susie!) set, we seem (she said cautiously and very quietly in case the trickster gods of all varieties are listening) to doing it.

This bodes well for all of us. Like most humans we are exceptionally tidal, lunar, rhythmic. Without being conscious of it. So our enthusiasm waxes and wanes, it washes in and washes out. Right now we're enthusiastic so we're not letting it go till we've got a rhythm happening that is becoming the familiar way to do things.

We've started heading upstairs to bed at 9pm rather than 10.30 and reading stories, the laptops are banished from the bedroom now I've got a reading lamp. There will be nights this summer when bed time will be delayed but self determined bed times have had a massively negative impact on our family's members. People have been over tired, carb loading, bickering, our mornings have been hugely delayed or non existent. We find it hard to get out of the house and our physical movement has been curtailed because we're so tired.

In the last few days we've had more energy, more enthusiasm, more focus. Jobs that need doing get done instead of shuffled side ways. The children's food choices have been healthier. The Eldest has suddenly taken on dishes and lunch time meal prep, found ways to positively express her hunger or frustration. This is rubbing off on the other children who imitate her moods and behaviours so closely. Sibling relationships have become less conflict focussed and people are working more on communicating.

It's not peachy keen perfect, there is still lots of shouting, poor food choices, frustrations with choices BUT there has been an astonishing, now I sit here quietly and think about it, seismic shift. It gives me hope that this year will be one of our best yet.

Our Everyday Caring list runs thusly (at the moment, I wrote it in lead pencil, anticipating changes as we change):

Breakfast - see menu plan, Ma&Pa
Put clean dishes away, breakfast things tidied, make beds, get dressed, pyjamas on hooks - children
Breakfast dishes Ma (M - F), Pa (W'ends, Public Holidays).
Laundry Ma (my favourite job of all)
Morning tea prep Ma and children
Table Time/Free Time/Out
Clear up - children
Table Time/Free Time/Out
Lunch (see menu plan), clear away, dishes, dinner prep (see menu plan)
Laundry in and away, toy pick up, pack up
Cook dinner Ma 2 days, Pa 2 days, The Eldest once and The Son once, Sundays is Common Meal.
Walk - forest, beach, just walk
Set table, eat dinner, "school" review, clear up
Baths, stories, bed.

Sounds busy but it's not, it's just a very detailed list of what suits us for everyday.

Up on the wall, near the menu plan, it makes life so much easier for us. We've had two years of little planning and whilst we needed that to relax from the external cues of school and extra curricular activities we are finding, especially with such a diverse range of personalities, that a group plan, discussed by all of us seems to suit us.
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1 Response
  1. Nadia Says:

    I like it :) It sounds very focused and seems like it will bring more order into your life. It's good to have daily direction, even if things ebb and flow, it's a good point to pick back up on.